What to do if guests not returning in the night without notification?

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

If have currently two guests. Two young ladies. They went out to see Petra Park, but they not returned after closing hours. Later I heard they went with two guys who are known for their very bad reputations and drugs abuse. My guests don't have a key for my house.  Am I now supposed to stay up half the night untill (and if) they return?

What would you do or advise me?

[Maria-Lurdes0]

Hi, this is not a good situation.  I'm sure that you have a good reason for not giving your guests a key, but since they do not have a key, you'll have to wait up (or be woken up) when they want to enter, even if it's 4 in the morning.  I haven't looked at your listing, but unless you specify in the house rules what time people can return to the listing, then you have to be available to open the door for them.   If they are making friends with suspicious people, that's their business and nothing to do with you.  If they try and allow those characters into your place, that IS your business and of course you can deny the extra guests entry to your place.

Good luck!

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

@Maria-Lurdes0  It IS my business here who my guests see, as I am responsible for them by law and by the police. I've warned them for those guys but yet the fooled for it.  If anything happen to them, the police will show up at my door !

If guests not return before midnight without notification, by law I must report them. This is JORDAN with the highest security and safety in the entire Middle East, and that is not for nothing.

For sure  I am going to change my house rules now. 

[Clare0]

Hi @Maryam-Al-Fakheer0, Happy New Year to you! Sounds like a very dangerous thing for these young ladies to do.  If you are the only avenue for getting back in the apartment, then unfortunately you'll have to be available to let them in.  What alternative is there? I suspect even if you have a time that guests must return, you will always have this situation come up if you don't let guests have keys.  The only way around it is to have some kind of lock with a password you can change after each guest so you don't have to wait up.  You might search on the internet for keyless entry systems.  Many hosts have them (I'd recommend but I don't have one) and each guest's code is the last 4 digits of their phone number so they can't forget.

Talk soon!

Clare

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

@Clare0 Thank you and Happy New Year to you too. I will never give any key to my house to any of my guests, as I need to be sure they not let others (locals) into my home as this is not allowed by the lease.   But I am going to change my house rules after this.  They finally showed up with two of the worse guys of my village, known and convicted for drugs and... rape !

Tomorrow I will see the Sheikh here, he will deal with them. It is not allowed for them to contact any of my guests. They have also tried to scam them for a bad tour in Wadi Araba.... (nothing to see there) for an extremely high price. 

Again I learned a lesson concerning "House Rules".  But I find it very rude of the two girls to stay out without any notification. ANd I told them that. They both appologized and I alowed them to stay. 

[Clare0]

@Maryam-Al-Fakheer0 these girls should be very grateful that you are looking out for them! Having lived in a foreign country, I know how naive, disrespectful and otherwise clueless Westerners (I assume..don't say where they are from publicly) can be.  I had no idea that you were legally responsible for their welfare and checking in at an appointed time.  Sounds like you need to impress on tourists from other countries what your cultural norms are as many will be clueless and assume that they can do whatever they do in their own.  Wow, sounds like these two really dodged a bullet and now that you've told them what can happen if they don't follow your rules they should thank you. 

You are in a more difficult position than other hosts here and I admire you greatly for taking on the challenge of hosting.  I wish you well!

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

@Clare0 Yes Clare, they are Westerners from USA ad indeed the most Westerners from both Europe and USA are naive, clueless and sometimes very disrespectful because they don't read about the countries rules, habits and customs. Just small example:  dinners are served to guests first on one large scale. The rest of the family or local guests eat after the guests. If I have lets say four guests and four locals in my home, I cook for eight or ten persons.  Most of the times the guests eat all of the meat (huge amount) and leaving the plate with only the rice, and even sometimes dare to ask to put the rest in a box for themselves. Never even consider there are others  or think about that the huge amount of food might be ment for others too. I put on my page as TIP: Try to read about local customs.... But nobody read. 

If I have a group of 5 guests or more.... I must have a manifest. And sometimes they will be escorted by a police officer. Jordan needs to know who is visiting the country and why. In this way Jordan is safe and terrorists have no chance. For that same reason the security needs to know where guests are. If a guest not return before midnight..... (meaning staying out without notification) it must be reported, just to be sure it's not a "guest" with bad intentions.

Jordan is a very safe country with great hospitality and tolerance towards all guests. 

[Robin4]

 Hi Maryam Al Fakheer, In a personal sense, I feel for you terribly....It must be hard for you to live with so much regimentation!! We don't mean it as a mark of disrespect to you or your culture! It is different, and we in a western type society find it hard to accept!

Yes I agree with the comments Clare has given you but, first and foremost you must impress upon your guests...particularly international guests, on your listing, the strick behaviour code that your country adopts and forces you as a host to adhere to. It's not a personal thing on your behalf, it's a part of living in your society! And you must make sure guests are aware of that... And on the food thing, most people do not eat in that fashion, in general we all believe in enjoying good food and sharing equally. I have never come across anyone like that and I think you may have been a bit unfortunate there!

Gee, I thought things were hard here dealing with authorities....but it's nothing to what you have to cope with.... but then again that is my culture, I know it's not perfect and yours has lots of benefits that ours does not have...but Maryam, that's what make this world so wonderful...It's not a matter of right or wrong.....we are all different. 

All the best Maryam....I hope you continue to host successfully......cheers Rob

PS: Is this an acceptable fashion in which to communicate ???

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

@Robin4 Thank you for your very kind reply. And you are so right, it is not about good or bad... it's just different. But there is no need to feel terribly for me. It is really not that hard. Jordan is very tolerant. Tourists can wear anything they like and even though people don't like tourists to see in tight shorts and tank tops... nobody will ever say anything about it and even give you a smile. 

There is no real strickt behaviour here.  Alcohol is forbidden for Muslims, but if guests like to have a drink.... they can. There are (limited) bars and nice places. I just can not serve them alcohol in my house. If they like to take wine or any alcoholic drinks with them into their rooms... no problem. I am just not a part of it. 

There is no night life here, there is nothing to do outside. There is no reason to be in the streets in the middle of the night. But if guests are invited to someones home for party or late dinners or having a BBQ out in the desert... no problem. As long as I know that they are out with the right people .....  for their own safety and for the countries safety.  I do believe it is a common and a normal behavior to let someone know you will be out till late hours.  Petra by Night show is till 22.30 and some guests like to have a drink after that in the Cave Bar near Petra Park. No problem.  Everything is closed here around 23.00 p.m. 

All tourists are highly respected and protected here. Although security knows where they stay, tourists do not see or feel anything about the security officers at all. But if someone not returns at midnight, the police has to be notified and might start a search. Don't forget that I live in a desert in mountains area with deep canyons and dark nights. It's just for everybodies safety. 

It is even possible here to sleep outside in the desert, in the mountains and yes.... even inside Petra Park, but ONLY  guided and after permission and registration at the authorities. 

[Robin4]

Hi again Maryam, One of the nicest couples I ever met, and became friends with, came to Australia from Jordan (Fahti and Salma) and I understand entirely what you say about the Jordanian culture. And your listings.... your food, look wonderful. Keep on doing what you obviously do so well. It was just that in the first conversation of this stream you almost sounded....frightened, that your guests behaviour might get you into trouble.....that was why I said I felt terribly for you.
All the best for the future Maryam....cheers....Rob

[Clare0]

@Maryam-Al-Fakheer0 I apologize for my countrymen.  Glad to hear Jordan is safe and I hope it will continue to be that way with all the madness going on in your part of the world.  I've always liked your King and his father.  May you have peace now and forever  If I could, I'd hop on a plane right now and visit you..such an interesting area!

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

@Clare0 Just hop on that plane!  You are always welcome to Jordan, to Petra and to my home !

Ahlan wa Sahlan (welcome)

[Lizzie]

Hello @Maryam-Al-Fakheer0,

I am relieved to hear your guests have arrived back with you safely, thank you for keeping us up-to-date with this and providing more information on hosting in your area. It is really great that we can come together from all over the world.