Declining a Request

[Debbie412]

Hi All, first time posting here and I have a bit of a rant but I would like some feedback from you on a situation I just experienced. Sorry for the lengthy post! I received a booking request this morning at 3:00 am (no I don’t use IB nor do I want to) this is how it all went

her-hello my sister and I will be traveling from NY so im not exactly sure what time we will be arriving

Me-Hi (guest name)what brings you to Montreal and who will you be travelling with? You mention your sister but the booking is 1 guest?

Her-hi im going to see family and I didn't realize I thought i fixed it my apologies

Me-Will it just be you and your sister staying then? Are you driving from New York?

her-its ok ill just get a hotel i understand your being cautious of your place but your kind of asking me questions that i kind of answered already

me-Sorry about that, but your answers were unclear.

her-its ok i never had to interview to stay at an air bnb before

me-Please remember to withdraw your request. Thank you

her-you can just deny it.

Of course I had to decline it and I’m sure it will affect my standing. Has anyone else had a similar situation? How did you handle it? Was I in the wrong? 

[Anonymous]

@Debbie412 When the guest displays a bad attitude and fails to provide basic necessary information, declining is the right thing to do. There's not really such a thing as "standing" - either you have an active listing or you don't - and your acceptance rate does not affect your "super host" status.

[Debbie412]

Thank you Andrew0, I felt I was in the right but she just got under my skin! This is my first year and for the most part it's been a great experience!

[Lisa723]

@Debbie412 An alternative would have been to accept the request and leave it to her to cancel. Possibly not your style though.

[Debbie412]

Lisa723 what if she showed up?! Lol! No definatly not an option!

[Martin333]

If it is a request one can decline specifically if the initial contact seems dodgy - reason - uncomfortable/unsuitable - it may show but according to customer support it does not affect.

If it is a direct booking still if the profile is empty and the initial message is weird one can cancel but should contact customer support.

As I see it - it is my property - it is valuable and I ultimately do decide who enters.

[Lisa723]

@Debbie412 Based on the message exchange that would be very unlikely. (FWIW your questions would have put me off too.)

[Debbie412]

Hmmmm interesting Lisa723. What questions do you ask your guests?

[Lisa723]

@Debbie412  if they are bringing pets, how many; and if they have no previous reviews and have not verified their ID, whether they would mind verifying it. But I am not sharing space with them.

[Anonymous]

@Lisa723  Considering that the guest was attempting to push through a 1-person booking when it was clearly more, I think it's relevant to ask how many people are actually coming. And while I can understand why some might find it a bit invasive to ask the purpose of their visit, there aren't many other questions that hosts can ask without seeming inappropriate or discriminatory. I always say that the best predictor of your experience with a guest is the way that they correspond with you, so if you have any doubts it's important to ask something that engages dialogue - even if the answer itself isn't relevant.

[Lisa723]

@Anonymous sure, clarifying the guest count is fine. I personally would not like to be asked who I am traveling with or what my mode of transportation will be, before being allowed to book. I sympathize with the guest’s feeling that she was being interviewed. I don’t ask those questions, nor purpose of trip. I would have asked nothing further after the guest responded that she was visiting family and thought she had fixed the guest count; and just sent an offer with the right count. Again though I am not sharing space (and never would). That is a whole different scenario.

[Anonymous]

@Lisa723  My impression was that @Debbie412  asked questions about the means and origin of transport because the guest refused to supply an arrival time, and the host didn't have 24-hour check-in. When you're planning your schedule around a check-in and the guest can't give you a straight answer, you need to at least have a picture of how they're getting there so you know what you're going by to plan your day. 

The alternative to this would be to specify a check-in time window on the listing and stress to the guest that you're only accepting arrivals during those hours. But can also trigger some nasty reactions from people who haven't thought through the differences between an airbnb and a hotel.

[Lisa723]

@Anonymous  Yes, if you can’t offer self-check-in of course it’s reasonable to ask for an ETA. I don’t see that among the questions in the quoted thread. Anyway if I needed to know ETA I would just ask for that. I wouldn’t try to deduce it from ancillary questions. Anyway, I’m not insisting that @Debbie412 did anything wrong. Just that those questions would have also made me, as a guest, decide the listing was not a good fit for me or vice versa. Nothing wrong with that if the host is fine with that outcome.

[Mike-And-Helen0]

@Lisa723 asking the purpose of a trip is a question airbnb suggests as an opening question.

It also helps to weed out those wanting to hold a party (sometimes).

[Lisa723]

@Mike-And-Helen0 Yep. It’s just not for me. I offer instant booking to guests with previous host recommendations or verified ID and as a guest I book usually with Superhosts and only via instant booking. Why my guests are traveling is none of my business and why I am traveling (or with whom or by what means) is none of my hosts’ business. If I offered a shared space or operated in a region with a party problem I’m sure I would do things differently— but I’d never do the former and probably not the latter.